Why your dog struggles to be calm and what you can do to help

The most common question I see in Facebook groups for high-energy Gundog breeds is…

“Any tips for making a dog calmer? They get walked regularly, daily enrichment, toys constantly, but they just don’t stop.”

Firstly, it’s important to understand that if you want a dog who relaxes easily regardless of the environment, a working-bred dog is not the best choice. These dogs have been selectively bred for generations to enhance the qualities needed for their job. Their ability to switch off in a busy home is often not considered when breeding.

If you’re already sharing life with a high-energy dog (which you likely are if you’re reading this!), it's important to accept them for who they are and what they need and educate yourself as much as possible to learn how to best meet these needs so relaxation becomes possible for them.

Here’s a bit more insight into calmness and relaxation to get you started…

You can quite easily and quickly teach a dog to lie down and be still, but stillness doesn’t necessarily mean calm. If you follow any working Gundog handlers on social media, you’ll see their dogs sitting still for long periods while waiting to retrieve. They are still, but they are anything but calm.

Calm isn’t a behaviour… it’s a physiological state.

It’s a regulated nervous system that can shift with ease between alertness and rest.

Many of the high-energy Gundog breeds I work with live in a constant state of alertness and anticipation because of two things:

1. Genetics:

They’re wired to notice and react to movement, sound, and scent.  In a stimulating environment like a home, they stay alert and ready to react.

2. Us:

In trying to meet their high-energy needs, we often create routines and patterns that actually fuel this constant state of alert and anticipation, making it even harder for them to switch off.

Before we can expect rest and relaxation at home, we need to tick at least two out of these three boxes daily:

• Appropriate physical exercise

• Breed-specific outlets

• Mental stimulation 

Puzzle feeders and enrichment toys do not tick the mental stimulation box!

Helping your dog learn what calm feels like...

 

Think of settle training like daily meditation practice.

For many of us, meditation is hard. Taking time to be still when there’s so much to do feels uncomfortable. But with daily practice, the body and mind learn to relax more naturally.

This is how we should approach settle training with our dogs. Settle is not about behaviour or exhaustion. It’s about helping the nervous system shift from anticipation and alertness, into rest and relaxation.

When dogs are alert or in anticipation, adrenaline, cortisol and dopamine are high.  These chemicals are responsible for fast reactions, staying alert, and reward-seeking.

When dogs are resting and relaxed, serotonin, GABA, and melatonin are high.  These chemicals slow brain activity, reduce stress, and support sleep.

These two states are incompatible so if you’ve fallen into the trap of constantly stimulating your dog and now struggle with rest at home, it’s because they need help learning to do less, not more.

We need to help their nervous system build the ability to shift from the chemical state that promotes activity to the one that promotes rest, and we get there over time with daily practice.

Things you need to consider for good settle practice...

 

Stillness:

 

Whilst stillness doesn't necessarily mean calm...calm starts with stillness.  If your dog can’t be still when awake, start with short daily sessions of calm and consistent food delivery in a down position, to start building muscle memory.  Follow these sessions with some down time in their crate with a chew.

 

Timing:

Choose their naturally quietest time of day, when they’re most likely to be sleepy and after two of the three boxes of their daily needs have been ticked.

Environment:

Clarity in their environment about what’s available and what’s not is essential. Remove opportunities for stimulation such as window watching, toys, and attention from you.  Create a defined space with a comfortable bed, water, and long-lasting chews only.  They may need you nearby at first, or they may find it easier when you’re not there. They may need you there but with a physical barrier like a pen or baby gate.

Support:

Some dogs will manage with long-lasting chews such as hooves, horns, antler, marrow bone, or a stuffed Kong. Others may need calm physical contact with slow, gentle strokes to their chest, shoulders, and neck - you need to channel your own inner-calm for this!

Diet:

Processed diets (e.g. kibble, especially high-carb types) can contribute to alertness and make relaxation harder. These foods cause glucose spikes and crashes, affecting energy, mood, and behaviour. Fresh, minimally processed diets support more stable energy and a calmer nervous system.

The longer your dog has lived in a constant state of stimulation, or the more naturally driven they are, the harder this will be and the more perseverance it will require. There is no quick fix for resetting a nervous system wired for anticipation, but if you persevere, the impact it will have on your lives together will be huge.

If you’d like some support or want to chat about how I might be able to help you and your dog, you can BOOK A FREE CALL HERE.  It’s a great way to talk things through, to see what could make life easier for you both, and to get a better feel for if I’m the right fit for you and your dog.